Create A Memorable Holiday
After cancer, most days can hold torturous thoughts or anxiety, but holidays can really provoke PTSD or even depression in knowing that it isn’t or could never be the same as it used to be. Reading this may even bring up some difficult emotions that have been blocked, hidden, or even tied up so that someone else’s holiday joy might not be diminished. However, I would like to propose a challenge, as a group, that we enter this holiday season with intention. Let’s hold each other up in our vulnerability, knowing that our feelings, and our emotions are honored here. You are not alone in these emotions and this is a safe space to be heard and heal. Be real and honest, what do the holidays provoke within you? There is not good or bad here, just real emotions.
In the idea of intention, the meaning of the word eudaimonia describes the highest state of PRESENCE and fulfillment which is achieved during periods of deep intention, mindfulness, work or prayer. Being in a state called "flourishing" allows us to solve our addiction to being distracted. Oh, how distraction seems like the easier path, but emotions will persist. Mine do. Do you typically try to remain distracted during the holidays? Distraction from the loss of tradition when Christmas comes and goes while in a hospital bed? Distraction from an empty chair at the dinner table? Distraction from the anxiety of how to create a healthy feast that everyone can enjoy? Distraction from what the holidays used to look like? We all have our own distractions, out of fear and heartache that may prevent us from truly being present.
Instead of distraction....FEEL. Feel and then be purposeful to create. Create healthy boundaries. What boundaries have you put in place for this season?
Healthy Boundary examples:
To entertain or to avoid toxic people? You know who they are. To create an environment that allows you to be at peace, enjoy a meal, or maybe laugh for the first time in months. Are those people there? On the flip side, who NEEDS to be there? Make that phone call and schedule it now!
Set social media boundaries. This is our number 1 distraction and barrier between us and our family. Turning off notifications for FB, Insta and even email sets the tone of you owning your phone and your phone not owning you. Set a time, maybe even an alarm, that allows you time to scroll during the day to catch up and then detach.
Be present. Be purposeful. Be intentional.
What are you doing different this year to be intentionally present? Being present! I know self-care has been talked about so many times but.......Be filled! Fill your cup so that your love may flow more freely. This goes back to one of my recent posts using Kris Carr’s quote “How would you nurture her, if you were the mother of little you?”
Another Being present example: Create whatever it is that you need to heal. Create a vision now of what being present looks like. A vision of what YOU want this season to hold. This could be completely NEW traditions that spark something within your soul. Don’t wait for it to happen and respond.
Please share your ideas or something that has worked in the past for your family. We are all here to learn and heal together.